You will never have good nachos again if you move to Britain. Never. Anyone who has moved here from the USA can attest to the fact that this is a nacho-deficient country. A sad, lost place where nachos exist in appearance, but their true essence and appeal is somehow lost. We expats shuffle through our… Read More Don’t order the nachos Charlie Brown!

If you’re not British, you may be forgiven for asking: “What is a Wetherspoon?”
It’s a chain of pubs, but it’s also so much more than that.… Read More An ode to Wetherspoons: The beating heart of Britain

Britain and America are in trouble. There are few jobs left for natural born citizens. They’ve mostly been taken by foreigners. At least that’s what politicians like Boris Johnson and Donald Trump keep telling us. In the UK, the Brits will soon vote on whether to leave the EU so they can start closing their borders, especially to refugees… Read More Britain in 1975 and America in the 1950s – the good old days (before foreigners ruined everything)

Hey British people. What’s the matter with you? You got like a million Italian restaurants in this country. You wear Italian clothes, some of you drive Italian cars. Italian perfume. All of that crap. Yet not one of you mamalukes seems to know the first goddamn thing about Italy or Italians. I can not even count the… Read More British people and Italians? Fuggedaboutit!

“It’s the reunion we can’t stop talking about!” “Best news ever!” “We are still struggling to contain our excitement!” British newspapers and websites were recently aflutter with news of a potential reunion of the cast from 1990s American television sitcom Friends. It seemed to be all anyone was talking or writing about. I have no… Read More The British love “Friends” more than the French love Jerry Lewis

A while back, I wrote a blog post “How to express enthusiasm like an American.” But I feel this is only half of the equation. British people aren’t only loathe to show enthusiasm, they’re also just as reticent to display anger. I don’t mean to say that British people don’t feel anger. They certainly do – they… Read More Angry in the UK: How to make a British person mad

I live in Europe. In London, to be precise. That makes me a European. Europe is better than America because it is filled with diverse countries and cultures. Right? For example, one of the big advantages of being a European is that you can visit other European cities so easily. For me, Paris is only 40… Read More Common-platz: Seen one European city, seen ’em all

I have a cold. My nose is runny, my eyes itch and I feel tired. So I have taken some Lemsip. Lemsip is a lemon-flavoured powdered cold medicine that you put in a cup, pour hot water over and then drink. That’s what you do when you have a cold in the UK. That’s what… Read More Choice: An American-only option

Thanksgiving is over in the USA, but today’s blog is about things I’d like to give thanks for about life in the UK. My American forefathers may have fled Britain in order to obtain more religious freedoms and economic opportunities, but here’s what they’ve missed out on by not just hanging in there: Right-wing Brits… Read More Things in Britain that I am grateful for…

Dear Britain, Thanksgiving is a big meal where you eat turkey with your family and think about what you’re thankful for. It’s not complicated. But you just don’t seem to get it. I tried explaining it to you. Last year, I wrote a comprehensive, day by day, moment by moment guide to Thanksgiving for British people.… Read More Britain just doesn’t get Thanksgiving